Funny Quesiton & Answer

Q: What makes a happy man?
A: Daughter is on the cover of Vogue, son on the cover of Sports Illustrated, mistress on the cover of Playboy and wife on the cover of Missing person

Q: What three things are common between the sun and woman's underwear?
A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear at night

Q: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
A: Because they are tired of using their own.

Q: What's common between men and video?
A: Both goes backward.. forward.. backward.. forward.. backward.. forward.. stop and eject..

Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it doesn't
come means you are in big trouble

Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?
A: A teabag.

Q: 7 qualities to be a perfect wife:
A: Beautiful, Responsible, Energetic, Adorable, Sweet, Truthful and Self-Organized.In short, she must have good B.R.E.A.S.T.S

Q: Who is a gynaecologist ?
A: He is the only fool on the earth who looks for problems in a place, where most people find pleasure.
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# 1
Husband climbs on the bed naked.
Wife: I have a headache.
Husband: Good! I have powdered it with aspirin. U want to take it orally or as an injection.

# 2
Three fastest means of communication:
1. Telephone
2. Television
3. Tell-a-woman

# 3
One day, DUREX complained to KOTEX: " Every time u work, I gotta 7 days off!"
KOTEX retorted: "Whenever u make a mistake during work, I gotta take 9 months leave".

# 4
A man called his 4th wife - Baby doll
3rd wife - China doll
2nd wife - Barbie doll
& 1st wife - Panadol

# 5
Man admiring his naked body in the mirror says to wife: "Look at that 75 kg of pure dynamite".
Wife replies: "It is a shame though about the 2 inches fuse".

# 6
Friends are like underwear, always near you.
Good friends are like condoms, always protecting you.
Best friends are like Viagra, lift you up when you are down.

# 7
Man tell MP: My son's a drug addict, my daughter's a prostitute, and my wife's a gambler.
MP: Isn't there anything positive in your family?
Man: Yes, I am HIV positive.

# 8
What is common between a wife and a private swimming pool??
Answer: The cost of maintenance is too high compared to the time you spend inside them!!!

# 9
Naked girl boarded a taxi. Driver stared.
Girl scolded him, "Never seen a naked girl before?
Driver replied "Yes! Seen many before but wondering where you keep your money to pay taxi fare."